...a real faceful. Seriously, ouch, ouch, ouch. I mean, how do you recover from things like:

"Gabe Newell suggested that Sony should scrap plans to release PS3 and develop an entirely new system."

This from the daddy of Half-Life. NOT small potatoes. Also, notably:

"'The happy story is the Wii,' he added. 'I’m betting that by Christmas of next year, the Wii has a larger installed base than the 360. Other people think I’m crazy. I really like everything that Nintendo is doing.'"

So basically, Sony gets a beatdown, Mario gets a handjob.

A fat bunch of Wii-related goodies to wrap up the week. For starters, Wii've got rhythm sticks on the Wii now:

Want to bet how long it takes for Drum Hero to appear on Wii? Thanks to the Wii Drum Machine, you've got a DIY fix to hold you over.

Want to tone up more than your forearms? We've also got the Wii Fitness Project to test, Morgan Spurlock style, if the Wii can help you trim down and tone up. I know I break a sweat beating up my wife in Wii Sports boxing.

Nerd alert: grad students reinvent the wheel; Power Glove to follow. I know that Nintendo learned their lesson with the useless but cool-as-hell-looking PG, but the Wii gives the old gizmo an actual chance at being useful. Maybe. Or something like it. We'll see. At any rate, this grad student could strike it rich by beating Nintendo to the punch, filing a patent, and then suing the pants off them for technology they've got in the marketplace... sigh. UPDATE: nevermind, Wii Powerglove now exists.

Finally, while it's no big shocker, November was a HUGE boom for the gaming industry, with sales up 34% last month! What's most interesting to note:

"Looking at how the new Sony and Nintendo consoles fared, the Wii sold through 476K units in the U.S. while the PS3 sold 197K units. Meanwhile, Microsoft's Xbox 360 (which is in far greater supply) sold 511K units. Interestingly, the PS2 managed to outsell the Xbox 360 yet again. In fact, so did the old Game Boy."

Hmmm....

In a landmark ruling in the land down under, in the Sony/Hardware/System maker vs. Mod Chip war, the Mod Chippers have won! The case basically points out that region-encoding limits consumers unfairly (amen), but also comes dangerously close to opening up the pandora's box of legalized piracy. It's a tough nut to crack: personally, it's my damn hardware and I should be able to play it, broil it, turn it into a habitrail, and yes, mod it if I want to. Telling console owners, consumers, that they don't have the right to mod their hardware is like saying Honda Civic owners can't tweak their engines. All of the you-bought-this-unit-so-therefore-you-agree-to-this-license-agreement is rubbish IMHO; if someone sells you something, that's that. It's yours. Do with it as you wish. If Sony, Microsoft and Nintendo wanted to lease consoles from now on, that'd be a different story. But for now, as long as we're lining up for days and buying consoles by the tens of thousands, any country with a decent legal system should follow suit with the aussies and let us crack the case and solder away.

Nintendo has already led a strong charge in circumventing the need for chips by making the DS region-free (play imports! all you want! yippie!), and if Sony and Microsoft would get out of their proprietary mindsets, chances are they'd see modding drop a notch as well by letting US/EU Otaku play Japanese imports on their systems.

First and foremost, who wants to get me 8 of these for Hanukkah? Either the original or the Advantage model would be dope. Thanks in advance.

Jumping over to Japan, Kotaku has had some great (and nostalgia-inducing) live coverage of the Japanese Wii launch sale, moblogged right from my old stomping grounds of Osaka's Umeda district. I made friends with the San Francisco 49'ers offensive line right outside that Yodabashi Camera store where everyone is waiting. Look at the lovely queues, all nice and peaceful. Living stateside again sure is a different experience...

In other Wii news, under the DIY hacks heading, we've got a nice set of instructions on how to rig up your included Wii sensor bar to run off a 9-volt battery, no wires need!

Finally, in what probably comes as the most scary and shocking news, there's been some major developments over at Sony: Ken Kutaragi (the father of the Playstation) was demoted right out of the gaming division of SCE, and replaced with... well it doesn't really matter who. The point is, to put it in plain terms, if the PS3 tanks, Sony as a company is doomed. Period. Wired can catch you up in full detail if you've been missing out, but to take out someone who's single-handedly crafted products that have netted Sony somewhere around 80-90% of their profits since the PSOne because of a risky Blu-Ray strategy is foolish, and as a Sony insider noted, could eliminate the chances for a PS4. Ever. We'll see - it would kill a part of my soul to see Sony die, but it's not looking good.

Just a few quick bits on the Nintendo front. There is an outstanding article from (of all places) the New Yorker on how Nintendo has won the console war by dropping out. I've been thinking as much for quite some time: Sony and Microsoft are gunning to take over Hollywood's profits for keeps, and the ultra-immersion-violence-and-fantasy genre is pretty much locked by the PS3 and Xbox 360. But... Nintendo has made gaming affordable, approachable, intuitive, creative, and fun on a much more universal level. I could get my dad to play Wii golf; I could never get him to touch something as complex as Gears of War.

Also, on my actual all-time favorite console, the DS Lite, the fantastic Space Channel 5 throwback Elite Beat Agents causes some moron to completely lose it. For those not scared by the DS Lite and music, you can use it to wirelessly control MIDI interfaces!

So yes, I got one. In spite of all of the tummy-sickening silliness surrounding console launches, I was brave enough to go hop on line in Times Square, NYC, initially as part of the "Wii Love You" project (run by two sweet kids at SVA, if you were there and remember 'em, feel free to drop them a line and say hi), but then since I was working the line till 2 a.m. or so, figured I'd pick up a Wii or two. And Zelda. And sure, an extra Wiimote.

Boy was it worth it - both the system and the experience. It was the polar opposite of all the PS3 horror stories, with the two Wii Love You kids (Michael and Sumayya, read about 'em here and butt cushions, coffee in custom printed sleeves, cookies, buttons, and lots of cheer in the chilly night while people were anxiously waiting around the block. You can see the whole set of photos by clicking here.

Since getting the damn thing home, it's been nothing but fun. The main source of amusement has been the plethora of hacks that are appearing for both the hardware and the software, including:

• Home-made Component (YPbPr, a.k.a. 480p a.k.a. HD) Cables , which look like hell but work just fine. Did I mention the cables alone are going for $130+ on eBay and are completely unavailable?
• Hacking the Nintendo Store Channel to point the version of Opera that powers it out to the rest of the web!
• Using two CANDLES?!? as a sensor bar replacement
• Making the sensor bar Wireless!
• Trying to figure out a reliable way to keep this from happening.

Overall, the thing has been a joy. The wife and our pals love it. Zelda is amazing (though I was concerned it was going to be to kiddy when I was catching fish to feed to kittens to get the slingshot to...), and surprisingly dark. Trauma Center is fantastic, but more or less a clone of the DS version. All in all, for $250 hard earned clams, it's way more fun than 40% of a PS3. Nintendo will be releasing 4 million units by 2007, so don't sweat it if you haven't found one yet. But consider it strongly if you do see one.